


going nowhere

by kantamu



Category: Infinite (Band), f(x)
Genre: F/F, F/M, POV Second Person
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-06
Updated: 2013-01-06
Packaged: 2017-11-23 22:11:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 544
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/627055
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kantamu/pseuds/kantamu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>you're in a car with a beautiful boy | based strongly off richard siken's you are jeff, repost, 2nd perso</p>
            </blockquote>





	going nowhere

you're in a car with a beautiful boy and you'd like to think he loves you, but he won't say he loves you. maybe it's because he doesn't love you. maybe it's because he loves the girl sitting behind you because she is a girl and you, you're not quite a girl. you're almost a girl. you are a girl but he doesn't see you that way, but the world doesn't see you that way.

now consider this. consider that you've met in different circumstances, that your hair is long and you're in a dress - not of your choosing, but a dress nonetheless - and maybe he's visiting from korea or maybe he's visiting from vancouver or new york or australia or maybe he's not visiting at all and he lives here. consider that you've met instead in a park, or the starbucks down the street, or a bubble tea store that you frequent and he doesn't, or he frequents but you don't. consider that you brush your hair behind your ear and he catches your eye, and maybe it was on purpose, maybe it wasn't. consider that you meet again, consider that he says he loves you or you say you love him even though maybe you don't believe in love.

consider this.

-

but here's the thing. and here's the thing and here's what you don't know, because you're too busy watching the girl sitting behind you through the rear view mirror. you're watching her chest rise and fall with sleep, her lashes flutter as she blinks, stirred awake because the road dipped slightly but not for long enough. you're watching her yawn as her eyes close again, teeth flashing pale between her lips for a split second - you're too busy watching all this to notice him watching at you.

and here's the thing and here's what you know. you're in a car with a beautiful boy. you're in a car with a beautiful girl. you're in a car with them both and you are neither.

-

there's a turn up ahead and he looks at you and grins in this devil-may-care way, but it's not quite that but maybe you think it's like that. hang on, he says, and foot to the pedal and he has your life in his hands and you're pressed up against the car door.

it's not the way you'd like to be pressed against the car door.

he asks if you're okay and you say yes. your chest is tight but it's not because of him, it's not because he has eyes you can't help but notice and lips that quirk at the corners and are frankly like anyone else's lips, and it's not because of the way his fingers grip the steering wheel, a pale silhouette against the dark faux-leather. there's a beautiful girl behind you and you love her with all your heart and all you can think is that there's a feeling deep inside you that's taken root, a bad feeling, a feeling that should not exist but it exists, and there's a beautiful boy beside you and he reaches over as if he means to touch you but he doesn't. he only picks up the coffee you'd forgotten about.

and he laughs. and you laugh.


End file.
